After months of not-so-subtle hinting and dressing up for every date night “just in case,” you’re finally engaged! Pop the champagne and get ready to start planning!

It’s important to get a head start on a few major things, even while the excitement of the engagement still has you floating on Cloud Nine. If you want your wedding day to feel even more magical, read on!

Aligning expectations and priorities

You may have always dreamed of an intimate backyard wedding with only 50 guests and a more low-key feel. But your parents want a big country club bash with all of their friends and second cousins in attendance. Now what? Aligning your expectations right after you get engaged is essential. You may have to compromise (and your parents will too, depending on who’s footing the bill). Think about what your priorities are. You may not care as much about the linens or the china, but you HAVE to have a band. Your parents may not think a wedding cake is worth it, but the wine list needs to be next-level. Identify the hills you’re willing to die on, and the things you can live without. Everyone will be happier knowing their voice was heard.

Curating your guest count

It’s easy to get carried away with a guest list. You have so many friends you want to invite! But let’s not forget about your fiancé’s college friends…your mom’s six brothers and their 15 children…your dad’s cousins that you have to include…and you haven’t even started on plus-ones yet!

But with every added guest comes a cost…literally. Each additional plate, chair, welcome bag, etc. drives up your total investment. The number of people you invite can depend on how much you’re willing to spend (see more in the next section!). But this cost can also be less obvious. You may have your heart set on a gorgeous estate with a stunning view – but the venue capacity is capped at 150 people. You may have to go back to that guest list and start making some tough decisions.

Think first about who you have to invite – this includes immediate family, grandparents, close friends, and your bridal party. Don’t forget plus-ones here if guests aren’t married (As a general rule, we advise only extending invites to guests’ spouses or long-term partners, unless that guest literally won’t know anybody else at the wedding).

Next, think about extended family and other friends who you’d like to be there. Think cousins, aunts, uncles, sorority sisters you still keep in touch with, and close coworkers. After that, it’s really up to you. You have to invite all of your coworkers to avoid office drama? Fine, just be prepared for more ‘yeses’ than you expected.

Sometimes, we recommend clients create an “A List” and a “B List.” This may sound harsh, but I bet you’re mentally pre-sorting people into those categories already. If your venue has capacity limitations, you may want to have the B-List handy in case some A-Listers can’t make it. Think of it like a flight standby list. So do you send everyone a Save the Date? Not necessarily! Send one to the people on your A-List, but hold off on the B-List until it’s time for invitations and you’ve already gotten some ‘nos’ from A-Listers. And of course, no one has to know what list they’re on!

General investment

You knew this one was coming. Probably because I mentioned it a minute ago, but also because it’s the first thing many families discuss. And if they don’t, they need to! Money can sometimes be tough to talk about, but deciding on a realistic and accurate budget early on will save you time and lots of heartache down the line. Trust me – you’ll be glad you addressed this right after you got engaged – or even before.

Your “must-haves” might cost a lot more than you think. On the other hand, you may worry that your budget won’t allow you to have your dream wedding. Not to fear! Wedding costs can seem daunting and confusing, which is why I put together this handy wedding budgeting guide to break it all down for you. Planners are pros at maximizing your budget to get you more of what you want and letting you know what you can cut without sacrificing the overall vision.

Pick your planner

While a planner may seem like a luxury you can live without, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Yes, it’s an additional cost to factor in, but the added value of a planner’s connections, wisdom and experience will save you money and take care of all the mind-numbing details – so you can focus on your vision! I’ve been in this business a long time and have worked on every kind of wedding imaginable. Executing with every range of budget, type of venue, and individual style and vision has taught me so much about the industry and how I can best serve my clients.

A planner should take things off your plate, not give you more things to worry about. Once you’re engaged, start looking for someone who you think you’ll work well with. They’ll make the whole experience so much easier and make your dream wedding a reality. Here’s a more in-depth guide to choosing your planner, including a couple key questions to ask when you’re interviewing them.

Getting engaged is just the first in a long string of exciting and emotional moments you’ll experience on the way to the altar, and getting on the right track immediately will make the experience so much easier. After all, this process should be fun, and whether you choose to work with us or another planner, we know you’ll be glad you did!

XO,

Molly